Skip to main content

Hippies and the impossibility of inaction.

When I was young I couldn't stand my uncle's hippie friends. They'd sit on the afternoon, drink a beer and spout a continuous stream of complains. The government this, society that, and on and on it went. I just looked at them, adults with the power to drive, with money and time enough to drink lazily one afternoon away and I'd ask them "Why don't you do something about it?" Organize a group, write an article, campaign, run for office something. I'd always get the same response. "There is nothing I can do." I didn't get it. I was young, penniless and locked in a high-school most of the time. They were none of that: adults, had money and had transpiration and power. I didn't get it. Till it happened to me and I became one of them.

I remember the vile frustration that was my first year out of college. It seemed that no matter what I tried to do nothing bore fruit. Temp jobs that never materialized, interviews that brought about nothing, it felt not only that all that work to get a degree meant absolutely nothing but that I was rejected by my own family for my opinions and thoughts. That who I was as an adult was worthless, ineffective and powerless to change anything let alone society. That was then. It was terrible.

But now it may just be the illusion of the past. But it feels so real that even the thought of trying to organize, or write something, or do anything meets with glacial internal opposition. "What's the use?" "It's not worth it." And when I do get enough mad courage to do the unthinkable and dare, my family jumps to the opportunity to put me down. Not consciously of course, but like me they've internalized the reality and frustration and in their worry to save me that feeling they maim the hope of action.

Does this happen to a whole society as a whole too? You bet.

From the minute I returned to Puerto Rico from Princeton I noticed the utter lack of entrepreneurial mindset. I kept riffing about it, and I got nothing but opposition or dismissal about it. For a while I thought it was denial, but now I think it's lack of awareness that there is a problem, that it is a problem and that there is even an alternative.

An entrepreneurial mindset is not confined to business, it can flourish in non-profits or even governments, when it dares to tackle big issues, and attempts big solutions. It dares to think that the solution is possible. That the enterprise can work and change society be it in it's choice of a product or service, or their consumption of water or even their thinking.

The problem is that once you catch the deflating infection of despair and see no fruit in your action, it's a bit like alcoholism, you drink a little and suddenly you're drowning in it. And boy have I caught it. So it's almost a daily battle. It's easier to have no skin in the game. It's easier not to play for keeps. Because that way if things go to shit you don't have any blame. But that's the thing that as a kid bothered me about the hippies, in action is blameworthy, blame-full.

So the dawn rises and I see the world and it's heading and I feel powerless about it, but is it an illusion of years past? Have I made the shadow of a fruitless past cover the Sun of today? The voices of the past that shut me down then, now shout from inside my own mind.

"Pero David quien tu te crees?"
"Ay yo no se David..."
"El problema lo tendras tu!"
"Que no se te suba lo de Princeton a la cabeza."
"Don't criticize others when your life is such a mess!"
"Y porque tu tuviste on problema con eso, no puedes..."

All these lead to a resigned internal dialog. "What's the use?" And illusion or not I can't tell the difference.

Time to touch beyond the shadows and see if it's all just smoke in there.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

What Medieval Economics can teach us about tariffs.

As a teen, I used to play Dungeons and Dragons (D&D) with my friends. This started an interest in the medieval period that led to me taking a medieval history class in college just to understand the period more. Over the years I've also read great books like " Dungeon, Fire and Sword " about the crusades (I recommend the book) and yet with all that knowledge it wasn't until recently that it occurred to me I had a completely wrong understanding of economics in the Medieval Period. "Viking helmets, sword and footwear" by eltpics is licensed under CC BY-NC 2.0 In my D&D games, players who are adventures battling monsters and creatures would need equipment and on the trips to town, they'd get resupplied with their adventuring necessities. I'd run these moments referencing my imagination of what it must have been and fantasy books I'd read. There be an inn with a raucous bar, a gruffly black-smith, if a city also a weapon and armor sm...

Testing with Cucumber, Sinatra and Capybara

Everything you need to know There are many elements you need to simultaneously learn to do effective testing of your code. Because some of these elements are very simple a lot of explanations just jump over what you need to know and give them up as obvious. Let’s start with a list of the things you need to learn: Gherkin (the language of Cucumber) ——> super easy Capybara (the DSL that controls the browser tests) Rspec (the DSL in which the actual pass/fail tests are written.) None of these are hard. But having to learn all at the same time can seem daunting. But it’s not! It’s easy peasy but takes time. :-/ It took me three days to get a handle on this. And I hope by reading this you’ll get a handle on it much much quicker. Let’s start with Cucumber first. Cucumber Five things you need to know about Cucumber: Cucumber tests are located on a features folder that have plain text files with a .feature extension and written in Gherkin . The .feature files contain t...

Windows 7 Fresh Install Procedure

My Windows 7 computer crashed last week. It had been giving me BSOD for a few days. This gave me an opportunity to start fresh with a new Windows 7 install. In re-installing I found a few thing I hadn't found before and re-visited some cool options. Configure the BIOS Windows 7 doesn't require any fancy BIOS setting but I would recommend that you make them Hackintosh compatible now, otherwise you wont be able in the future. There are three changes you should make: set Suspend to S3, SATA to AHCI, and HPET to 64bit. Installing Windows 7 64-bit I don't have a wired connection to my computer so I install from a DVD, then I run through this installation procedure. Install Wireless Driver: TP-Link (from CD) Run Windows Update (several hours & restarts) Use Ninite ( ninite.com ) to install Microsoft Security Essentials first. Then use Ninite to install other software like for example:  Chrome, Opera; Skype, Pidgin, Thunderbird;...